Horror Stories

Halloween 2019

The following horror story was anonymously submitted by a TWAPS member for Halloween 2019.

His/her submission wins a £25 tackle voucher.

Congratulations to the Member concerned…


“I was fishing a match at Blue Water from the shingle beach. We didn’t start the match until 10am because of traffic problems. It was a quiet match with the usual banter going around the lake. We didn’t have mobile phones back then, so no interruptions from various ringtones going off. Unfortunately, it also meant no communications with the wife/girlfriend/partner etc., for some fishermen this was a blessing, their day off from chores.

On this particular day, I was half way through the match, when I heard a car drive through the open gate at speed. A lady got out of the car and started shouting and screaming at the fisherman next to me. I caught some of the words she said and she mentioned Sunday lunch.

What I didn’t realise was that she was holding a full plate of Sunday roast in her hands. Hurrying down the shingle beach, she then turned the plate upside down and firmly planted said contents with some force on poor unfortunate fisherman’s head. At the same time I turned to see what was happening and a batter pudding came flying off the plate and hit me squarely in the eye. Now, I am not one to criticize anyone’s cooking, but I don’t remember my mother making batter puddings as hard as rock cakes. Out of my now rapidly swelling eye, I looked over to see 3 slices of chicken firmly entrenched on his head, with what I have to say was quite a good selection of vegetables slowly running down the rest of him. The lady, presumed to be girlfriend or wife (although I am just guessing here) had long since stormed back into her car and sped off.

I went to work next day with a black and blue eye and the usual banter of ‘who did you go 3 rounds with’ ‘did you bump into a door’ ‘No, I got hit in the eye by a batter pudding’ silent pause, rapturous laughter. I never did live it down.”

Fishing Horror Stories
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TWAPS Updates

Our popup announcer contains updates and important information about society matters. Click the bell icon regularly to check for new updates.

Inn on the Lake – Temporary Closures


At the hotel owner’s request, the fishery will be closed to all Members on Tuesday 21st May from 7pm, and will reopen at 7pm on Wednesday 22nd May.

Locks will be changed whilst closed.

Thank you for your patience and understanding.

The Committee

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Polite Reminder – Pike Fishing


This is a polite reminder to inform you that fishing for pike is now banned on all TWAPS waters until 1st October 2024. Pike fishing is only permitted from 1st October until 31st March each year.

The Committee

Inn on the Lake Fish Survey

In March 2024 a fish survey was carried out by AE Fisheries on the Main Lake at the Inn on the Lake. See the ‘Fish Survey’ section on the Inn on the Lake page.

Other surveys are to follow at Shorne Country Park, Cobham and the Middle Lake
at the Inn on the Lake. These are to be carried out during the winter of 2024-25.

Renewing Membership Queries


If you have any queries regarding renewing your membership please use the Contact Form.

Please do not contact Bailiffs or Committee Members directly – you will be directed to the website.

Thank you.
The Committee

Carp pellets for sale


The Head Bailiff, Gary Bushell, has acquired carp pellets for sale to TWAPS Members at cost price.

If you would like to purchase some, or find out more details, contact Gary – BY TEXT ONLY PLEASE.

His number is on your membership card.

The Committee

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Inn on the Lake – Main Lake Jetty


The owners of the Inn on the Lake Hotel have complained that some TWAPS Members are feeding fish from the jetty.

The jetty and patio areas are STRICTLY OUT OF BOUNDS to all Members for feeding or fishing.

Any Member caught either feeding or fishing from the jetty or patio areas will receive an instant suspension pending a disciplinary hearing.

We are currently waiting for the CCTV footage to be looked at.

The Committee

Pike and Predator Fishing Open Evening

A pike and preditor open evening for all TWAPS Members is being organised for Tuesday 16th April 2024 starting at 7:30pm, at the Inn on the Lake hotel.

There are two guest speakers, Mark Barnet and Gary Peet.

More information will follow in due course.

The evening is open to all current TWAPS Members.

If you are a TWAPS Member and would like to attend please contact Gary Bushell, Head Bailiff, by TEXT ONLY PLEASE (please do not phone), so we have an idea of how many are coming. Please include your full name and your TWAPS membership number. Gary’s number is on your TWAPS membership card.

There will be a raffle on the night, with several prizes on offer.

Thank you

The Committee

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Inn on the Lake, Main Lake, Swim 18 Closure

Swim 18 on the Main Lake at the Inn on the Lake is permanently closed.

The Committee

Stocking Update

Saturday 16th December.

Fish supplied by VS Fisheries.

Delivered and stocked:

At the Inn On The Lake – 2 x c7s:
One fully scaled mirror of 29lb 4oz, known as “Hammond’s Mirror”.
One mirror of 27lb 10oz, known as “Buxton’s” Mirror.
These two fish were named after the two longest serving Committee Members.

At Cobham
Cobham bottom pond – 50x c3 mirrors up 6lb 5oz.

At Shorne Country Park
100 x C2s in to Long Lake, up to 3lb 8oz.
100 x C2s in to steps lake.

Photos for Cobham and Shorne to follow.

TWAPS is always building and protecting our stocks for the future.

Only silvers and tench to arrive now – in the new year.

The Committee.